MY EXPOSE ON POLYGAMY
“Was It really a Divine Revelation from God to Joseph Smith that people had to live this so-called “principle” in order to attain the highest degree of glory in heaven?”*
The above question was on the Discussion Board of a mainstream LDS Mormon blog site I happened to run into on Facebook.
Get ready for a mouthful! I couldn’t resist giving these innocent people and true believers a piece of my mind, I, having had first-hand experience the first twenty-one years of my life living within this morbid, backward lifestyle.
But first, if you are not familiar with Mormon doctrine and history, do you know why LDS mainstream Mormons began living polygamy in the first place in the early history of their church? And do you know why many mainstream Mormons still believe it will be lived in heaven?
My intent right now is not to give you a history of this whole rancorous debate and bizarre belief. You can find plenty about it in such books as Todd Compton’s well-researched book, In Sacred Loneliness, and Fawn Brodie’s documentary No Man Knows My History.
My intent is to present to you my response to a Mainstream Mormon online site, where members were discussing their feelings and beliefs about the idea of having to live polygamy in the hereafter.
In response to their questions and concerns, I dared to post on their Discussion Panel my very honest Ex-polyg perspective. You can imagine it went over really well with devout followers of Joseph Smith – I’m being facetious of course because the following is what I posted:
It is common for cult leaders to use their power to sow their wild oats! Joseph Smith, the so-called “Prophet,” was no exception. Also, it’s human nature for women to want to be married to the greatest and strongest male in the pack — common in the rest of nature, too.
So let’s not kid ourselves that Joseph Smith was simply restoring a practice from the Bronze age—in which the Bible was conceived. That polygamy is a predatory, territorial, male dominance, and prestige-practice is more like it — among other reasons FOR WHY many men, given the power to do so, love to “experience” and go from one woman to the next — like a bumblebee tasting each flower.
It’s a testosterone thing if nothing else — Nature’s way of propagating the human race and making sure it doesn’t die out. And it’s Nature’s way of also propagating a stronger, better human race–when it comes to women wanting the most outstanding man on the totem pole. Take a look at how apes, et Al, and their alpha-male system works in Evolution’s procreation, for example.
By the way, please note that my comments come from personal experience. And I am a writer/blogger presently writing my memoirs, my story of having been raised a fourth-generation Mormon Fundamentalist polygamist who then became a fifth-generation polygamist wife.
Of note: Carolyn Jessop, best-selling author of, Escape, is my cousin. Best-selling authors Irene LeBaron Spencer of Shattered Dreams and Cult Insanity and Susan Ray Schmidt of His Favorite Wife are my Aunts.
Also, Anna LeBaron, author of the memoir The Polygamist’s Daughter, is my first cousin — a daughter of my Uncle Ervil LeBaron. And Ruth Wariner, best-selling author of The Sound Of Gravel, is also my first cousin — a daughter of my Uncle Joel LeBaron.
Also, the amazing Ex-Mormon Fundamentalist TV and YouTube Producer, Rebecca Kimbel, is my aunt through marriage. And the late “Evil Ervil” LeBaron, the Mormon Manson, and Ex-Mormon mafioso leader of one of the LeBaron crime families is my mother’s brother. (See: Wikipedia, and my Website Menu for more information on Ervil LeBaron, and my extended family.)
To add to my Mormon lineage, my Great-great-grandfather Benjamin F. Johnson was one of Joseph Smith’s personal Scribes —and sealed to him as a son. That’s how far back my roots in Mormonism go. As a Mormon, I was part of the “Royal blood!”
When polygamy was done away with, in the mainstream Mormon church, devout but wayward, laws-unto-themselves Mormon followers, who believed this action was against the teachings and prophecies of Joseph Smith, broke away and formed Mormon Fundamentalist splinter groups.
Let me now segue into my own experience of having lived polygamy, by first stating that it’s a well-known fact that most Mormon Fundamentalists are strongly against homosexuality – at least in word. (I’m not so sure about some of them when it comes to actions. I don’t think “some of them” are sure either, LOL!)
But it’s not unusual, in my experience, to find that Mormon fundamentalists often preach one thing, do another “under cover” (Pun intended). No doubt God revealed to them that it was okay? My experience is that they justify everything with some kind of revelation.
Growing up in Mormon fundamentalism, I had no idea that homosexuality existed, let alone what the term meant, when I was given away in a prearranged marriage at age sixteen, to a man ten years my senior.
I only “knew” I was being married into “the holy matrimony of plural marriage,” in the name of the revelation given to Joseph Smith and recorded in the 132 Sec. of the Doctrine and Covenants (Mormon scriptures). Now hold on to your sandal straps, for I suspect this revelation was really revealed by his “small head,” not his large. (Sorry, all you devout Mormons.)
Anyway, it was many years later, after I escaped this cult in 1967 at age twenty-one, that I began to piece everything together. Only then did I realize the man I was married to for going on five years had been bisexual, as were his wives.
However, they went to great measures to make sure I never found this out. For they would be cut off “The Church,” and maybe even beat up or killed, if word got out they were bisexuals—and involved in threesomes and even orgies at times.
They had very subtly tried to bring me into “the family.” But when I did not respond to such things as the foot one of the wives laid on my foot, the night I was invited to spend with her in her bed, she and the other wife realized I would be getting “their” husband all to myself — on my nights.
This caused the first two wives lots of jealousy and resentment toward me. They felt threatened and “turned down,” among other things, I suspect. I just did not fit into their little love nest.
You can’t imagine the rest of what I went through in that marriage due to this. They said I had ruined Bill’s “family” — because I only wanted a one-on-one relationship with my/our husband!
It wouldn’t have been as bad had I not been so in love with my/our husband — and had I not been still a very trusting, overprotected, deprived, under-educated girl with, at best, only an eighth-grade education. I was but an innocent and naïve sixteen-year-old child who had not been properly prepared for the realities of polygamy.
To make matters worse, the first wife wife was fifteen years my senior—when I was fifteen, she was thirty. The other wife was six years my senior.
In other words, I was a poor, disadvantaged, naïve adolescent dumped into a polygamous marriage with practically everything against me, including that both “my husband’s” other wives were not only far older but far more experienced, worldly-wise, and educated than I. Furthermore, both had been married to “my husband” for numerous years before I came into “the family.”
So they knew what my/our husband liked and how to manipulate and run him. Plus the first wife was about five years older than my/our husband and held the purse strings. He had to rely on her for money to support his families! It only gets worse from there. I bring this out because it has to do with some of my outlook on polygamy — like who does it work for and who doesn’t it work for?
I am now an Ex-polygamist wife, Ex-plyg, Ex-FLDS, Ex-Mormon fundamentalist, an escapee from the LeBaron cult, and a recovering Mormon. My testimony is that Mormon polygamy continues to be sustained only under the umbrella of the almighty “religious freedoms” rights!
But there are no rights for the children born and raised in polygamy — often a cesspool lifestyle, if ever there was one. Mormon fundamentalist sects are nothing but syndicated, organized-crime groups cloaked and protected under the guise of religion.
I mean this lifestyle stinks — especially for the children born into polygamy. And for the innocent, uneducated, naïve childbrides married off to older, even aged men and their harems! ‘Tis hell on earth for the majority of people in it!
But masochists pleasure in pain. They consider it wicked/worldly to have a nice, enjoyable life. So foot-washing Fundies smear a fake smile on their face—to “keep sweet”—and feel successful that this is one area wherein they have some control over their life—one thing at which they may succeed.
And sure: There are good things in every bad. However, polygamy is mostly bad — especially for the children who did not ask to be born into this crazy, convoluted, depraved, deprived, abusive, unfair, bizarre, secluded, cult lifestyle.
To begin with, it’s reminiscent of the old feudal-style systems of the Middle Ages … except most people didn’t live polygamy even back then and most churches had outlawed it!
It is a lifestyle forced upon Mormon fundamentalists through brainwashing — from the day they are born … because their own parents were brainwashed with these concepts, too, from the day they were born — unless of course, they were converts to this convoluted, extremist, reprehensible lifestyle.
Put another way, most Mormon-Fundamentalist polygamists were born into the polygamist indoctrination. Or they joined it in the time of Joseph Smith’s leadership and teachings, in the early to mid-1800s — teachings that convinced Smith’s devout followers God commanded them to live polygamy or be damned to hell.
But other than the polygamist male, mostly only some lesbians may benefit at all from a man having plural wives. To be blunt, I’m referring to “Big Love” nests.
I have known a few lesbian women who swear by polygamy! But my experience is: If you want over-all bad, enter polygamy and find out for yourself, the hard way, what polygamy is all about.
Many inductees, as well as converts to plural marriage, have soon discovered for themselves what polygamy is all about. That is, they found out the hard way why polygamy should never be legalized!
More on this in my many posted blogs. I recently published a Book Review on my Website called It’s Not About the Sex, My Ass! Written by Joanne Hanks, it’s my first recommended wonderful read, if you want to get an insider’s first-hand view of life in polygyny.
See my other blogs and Menu on my website for more excellent Media on polygamy/polygyny and Mormon fundamentalist history and lifestyle. Also, see listed there, for your edification, films about Mormon fundamentalists, as well as a host of other excellent books written by Ex-polygamist wives and other experts on the subject.
Till then, tell me, are you of the persuasion polygamy should be legalized? Why or why not? I would love to read your comments concerning this controversial subject.
Till then, cheers and have a wonderful life. Thanks for visiting my blog at: https://StephanySpencer.com.
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LDS Theses #52: It [the LDS Church] hypocritically claims that polygamy has no place in the contemporary LDS Church even though Joseph Smith’s revelation on polygamy (Doctrine & Covenants 132) is still canonized scripture and “Celestial Polygamy” (being eternally married to at least one more woman after being widowed or divorced) is practiced. Currently, three widowed Mormon Apostles (Dallin H. Oaks, L. Tom Perry, and Russell M. Nelson) are Celestial Polygamists.
From “What is Celestial Polygamy?” by Bill McKeever:
‘Having more than one wife in the “here and now” is grounds for excommunication from the LDS Church; however, the possibility of having more than one wife in the “hereafter” is still very much a part of the Mormon culture. According to an article in the April 20, 2008 edition of the Salt Lake Tribune:
“Though the LDS Church had disavowed polygamy, it is still enshrined in Mormon scripture (Doctrine & Covenants 132) and some believe it will one day be re-established, if not on Earth, at least in heaven. In his quasi-official 1966 book Mormon Doctrine, which remains in print, the late LDS Apostle Bruce R. McConkie wrote that `the holy practice will commence again after the Second Coming and the ushering in of the millennium.’ And by policy, men can be `sealed’ for eternity in LDS temple rites to more than one wife, though women are permitted only a single sealing. Three of the church’s current apostles, for example, were widowed and remarried. Each will have two wives in the eternities.”
(“Modern-day Mormons disavow polygamy”; http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8989865 )
Note carefully the last sentence, “Three of the church’s current apostles, for example, were widowed and remarried. Each will have two wives in the eternities.”
The three Mormon Apostles referred to in this article are Dallin H. Oaks, L. Tom Perry, and Russell M. Nelson. All three men are widowers, and all three men have been “sealed” to a second wife.
During a devotional address Mormon Apostle Dallin H. Oaks gave at Brigham Young University on January 29, 2002, he confirmed that he fully anticipates spending eternity with Kristen M. McCain, whom he was sealed to in the Salt Lake Temple on August 25, 2000. Oaks’ first wife, June Dixon Oaks, was sealed to him in marriage on June 24, 1952. She died in 1998. In his BYU talk, Oaks said, “When I was 66, my wife June died of cancer. Two years later I married Kristen McMain, the eternal companion who now stands at my side.”
(see http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=229 )
What is the point of being “sealed” for eternity? Speaking in General Conference in 1994, Seventy Charles Didier stated:
“This [marriage] union is solemnized by the authority of the everlasting priesthood into a holy and sacred ordinance, the temple sealing. It is also called the new and everlasting covenant of marriage, and its purpose is to bind couples together on earth and bring them to a fulness of exaltation in the kingdom of God in the hereafter.”
(“Remember Your Covenants,” Ensign (Conference Edition), May 1994, p.42; http://www.josephsmith.net/ldsorg/v/index.jsp…).
In a January 28, 1999 City Weekly article titled “Only for Eternity,” author Andrea Moore Emmett quoted LDS Church spokesman Dale Bills who said, “We have to see sealing ordinances as a promise pending faithfulness and yes, some will live polygamy.”
Mormon women who find the teaching of celestial polygamy unsettling will probably not find comfort in a May 31, 2006 LDS Newsroom statement that reads:
“Question: Is polygamy gone forever from the Church?
We only know what the Lord has revealed through His prophets, that plural marriage has been stopped in the Church. Anything else is speculative and unwarranted.”
(see http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/…/polygamy-questions-and-answ… )
If it is really speculative and unwarranted, what is the point of Mormon widowers being sealed in Mormon temples? If temple sealings of this nature have significance in the hereafter, how can the LDS Church honestly say “plural marriage has been stopped”?’
(source http://www.mrm.org/celestial-polygamy )
2015 UPDATE: L. Tom Perry died on May 30, 2015 leaving Dallin H. Oaks and Russell M. Nelson as the only remaining living Mormon Celestial Polygamist Apostles.