Notes, Quotes, Jokes, Pokes, ‘n’ Anecdotes

Bimbo Weeps:

 I’m sittin’ alone in the moonlight,
At the Heartbreak Hotel Café,
Abandoned by women and men;
And here’s all I have to say,
“I’ll never eat garlic nor onions again!
No, not till my dying day!
NOT if it drives my friendships away,
And serves only to keep romance at bay”

Stephany Spencer



Bimbo Notes:

One’s a plenty, two’s a crowd,
Three on the sidewalk is not allowed.”
(But have you ever noticed in “Big Love” they might
Be doing it behind your back — or closed doors?
Step on a crack and try to keep track!)
Stephany Spencer

Bimbo Speaketh

Please, God, don’t let me be a fruitcake this Christmas;
I don’t want to be eaten by one either!
Stephany Spencer



Online Dating

When it comes to online dating,
If yer lookin’ fer a mating,
The odds er good
That the goods er odd;
So “wrots of wruck” with yer mate-baiting!
I won’t be “holding a bag” waiting.
Stephany Spencer


 Longing for a Soulmate No More

I used to long for a Soulmate,
But I don’t anymore,
‘Cause I damn well know, to my very core,
Who’d get stuck picking up after him …
And a lot more!

For that same reason,
In my “Golden Sage” season,

I no longer dream of Mr. Wright
Nor a shining-armored knight;
I’ve learned that that’s all fairytales –
That no one’s coming to save me;
For sure, no horny, hairy males!
And Stupid-Cupid least of all:
Cupid’s but hormones ‘n’ Nature
Having a ball.

So at long last, I’ve come to see

My soulmate’s the other half of me;
And it’s well that this should be.
So I’ll leave my fate to God,
And what will be, we’ll see!

Stephany Spencer



Me, Myself, ‘n’ I

Sittin’ alone in the moonlight,
I heard a lonesome cry;
It must have come from within;
There was only me, myself, ‘n’ I!

Then I chanced to ask it,”Why?”
Came the voice in soft reply:
“’Because, therefore, ‘n’ wherefore; That’s why!”
So I gathered myself up with a sigh,
‘Cause there was only me, myself, ‘n’ I.
Stephany Spencer
(Written at age 14)              


Bimbo Speaks:

“Love may be blind,
but jealousy has binocular vision!”
Stephany Spencer


“Complacency breeds poor insight,
But envy sports telescopic sight!”
Stephany Spencer



Says Bimbo:

Who cares if four-inch heels
Give you bunions,
Backaches, ‘n’ achin’ feet?

What’s important is yer legs
Look long ‘n’ sleek,
And yer ankles slim ‘n’ petite!

Stephany Spencer



 Bimbo Says: 

“There’s a vast amount of undeveloped territory
just below my fancy hat ‘n’ hairdo —
 ‘n’ right betwixt me ears!”

Stephany Spencer



The Bimbo Class

My claim to fame is shoppin’,
Cause most parts of me are perfect ‘n’ hoppin’;
So if it’s all the same to you,
I’ll keep right on boppin’ in my fancy hat ’n’ updo;
Let the intellectuals study it if they want to —
And the undeveloped matter under it, too!

In “Alice, Through the Looking Glass,
It didn’t matter where
The Mad Hatter had ‘er — nor ‘er class;
An’ it doesn’t matter a hair
To the hare, either, what I do
So don’t be a hair up my ass!
(Well, did you expect better of the Bimbo class?!)
Stephany Spencer



A Bimbo Breakthrough:
Old age ain’t fer sissies … Neither is bein’ a woman!

        Stephany Spencer 

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