~ Original Sayings ‘n’ Short Poems From My Pen to Yours



I Think Mice Are Very Nice

I think mice are very nice.
Some people say they have lice
Leave mouse tracks in their rice.
But with pet mice that’s quite rare;
So I still do declare,
I think mice are very nice!
~Stephany Spencer
(My first poem, age 8)

I wrote each quote
Each quote I wrote:

~Yesterday’s sorrow
Is the humor of tomorrow.

~Today’s sorrow is grist
For humor mills of tomorrow.
I wrote each quote
Though the concept’s
Been around a long time,
‘Twas moi who put it
To rhythm and rhyme.
~Stephany Spencer




Threadbare Underwear
While growing up dormouse-poor,
I avoided being caught once more
With clothing threadbare
And dingy underwear
(When guests were there)
By using the worst first,
‘Lest the best be gone
Before the guest.
 ~Beulah Stephany Spencer
(age 12)

Long Fellows
I’m a poet and know it,
But my feet don’t show it!
They’re not Longfellow’s,
They’re short fellows
~Stephany Spencer -LeBaron

The Old Grind
I’ve kept my head to the grindstone,
My shoulders to the wheel;
It’s the best way I knew
To grind out a deal.
~Stephany Spencer


The “Butt” of a Joke
His butt’s as broad
As a broad’s or bitch’s
But flat as the broadside
Of a barn in britches…
But could this “butt” be
But a yarn in stitches?
I’m sure not sure which it is!
~Stephany Spencer  


An Anecdote Quote

Find love before it’s too late
Is always good advice to take
For the older you get
And the longer you wait,
The harder it gets

To find a mate.
~Stephany Spencer


Go Thru It to Get Thru It

They say we must go through it
To get through it — 
Go back over our past
And go through the shit 
Again and again
To get through with it.

The only way out 
Is through it, then;
And we must do it
Over and over again
Till we get it.
Then we can move on.
 Got it?  
Then move on!  :)~
~Stephany Spencer



Watch out for those who offer
“A shoulder to hold ‘er,”
Or cry on!
And promise the sky;
But lie on and on …
Then let it fall on you.
For one in ten people
is a Con—A sociopath,
Says “The Sociopath Next Door,”
Martha Stout.
(You may want to check it out.)
~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron


Follow Your Own Higher Power

Fanatics say:
Don’t think you’re a big shot!
You’re not.

You’re a little snot.
And don’t get out of line:
Toe the line!
Serve the Divine!

But I say:

Don’t mind!
Use your own brain.
Follow your True Self’s line.
That’s the reason God gave
Humankind their own mind.
~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron


None of Our Business

What I think of myself
Is none of your business.
And what you think of me
Is none of mine!
In other words,
What I thinketh of me
Is none of thine;
And what thou thinketh of me
Is none of mine.
~Stephany Spencer


images-2Stinky Propositions

They fit hand-in-glove,
Those in iniquity —
The power-mongers
And their brown-nosers
Rooting for perks, power,
And popularity.
I’ll do anything to make it!
“Even stoop ‘n’ take it
,” says he —

I’d let him make it in my ass,”
Says young Joe Crass,

A wannabe …
Anything to be in a movie!”
It’s a stinkin’ proposition,

If you ask me!
~Stephany Spencer


Ageing = Sageing

man-from-1700sThe Edge of Age: Forever young

The “edge of age” Is ever cutting
Into my joy and amore, anymore.
As I “sage,
I find it hurts to be joked about,
Left out, left to die;
Looked down

As though old age were a catching sore.
Ostracism hurts to the core!

Oldsters are the butt of comedians’ fun
We find the old-foggie pun
Funny when we’re young.
But now I’m old,
I find it unkind, And overdone.
“Old folks!” you say.
We oldsters are human …

We’re still someone!
You’ll be in our shoes someday.
Everyone ages day by day,
From the moment we’ve begun.
Won’t be long before YOU
Hit the wall on the run
Then you’ll discover too,
One’s soul is forever young.

~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron



Doctors and Hospitals


Free-wheeling Racketeers

Without an ombudsman to accompany me,
 Doctors can often be freewheeling racketeers,

I now see –-
Free to wheel their rackets however they please;
Unresponsive to their patients’ pleas
Especially when there’s
no witness to back them up.

For Doc’s ‘n’ dentist have no fears:
Their peer-policies assure
No corrections by their peers!
Complete power corrupts completely,
So they’re Rollin’ in high gears!
Therefore, I’m an impatient inpatient,
Laden with fears!

Stephany Spencer-Lebaron


I’m an impatient inpatient!


Let’s “takeoff” the weight:
“Butt” wait! There’s more:

Let’s “Take Off” the Weight:
“Butt” Wait! There’s more:


  Party Pounds

Party Pounds
Equals “Party-Potluck Dinner.

f you
d be thinner,
Be a winner:
Avoid the party-potluck dinner! :)~

~Stephany Spencer



From Lips to Hips:

They say:
A moment on the lips,
Forever on the hips!
I say:
A moment in the mouth,
Forever down south!

~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron

Work It Out to Get It Out

 Work it out to get it out —
 Again and again:
 To be healthy and thin,

We must work out anger and pain
That’s been stored in our body …
Work it out again and again.

The body keeps the score;
Therefore, we must work it out
Time and again
The old pain, and more.
Stephany Spencer

Men and Romance:
 My Romance with Chance —
 A Chance Romance

In Love with a Fiddler

 Being fit into his schedule,
As fits his fiddlin around,
Leaves me unfit
To get ’round downtown;
“Cause I’m tied in stitches and fits,
Playing second fiddle
to a philandering clown
Whose let-downs constantly
Get me down.
~Stephany Spencer


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