~ Original Sayings ‘n’ Short Poems From My Pen to Yours



I Think Mice Are Very Nice

I think mice are very nice.
Some people say they have lice,
And leave mouse tracks in their rice.
With pet mice that’s quite rare,
So I therefore declare,
I still think mice are very nice!
~Stephany Spencer
(My first poem, age 8)

 Each quote I wrote …
I wrote each quote I quote:

~Yesterday’s sorrow
Is the humor of tomorrow.

~Today’s sorrow is grist
For the humor mills of tomorrow.

I wrote each quote:
Though the concept’s
Been around a long time,
‘Twas moi who put it
To rhythm and rhyme.
~Stephany Spencer




Threadbare Underwear
Growing up dormouse poor,
I avoided getting caught
With clothes threadbare
And dingy underwear,
When guests were there,
By using my worst first,
‘Lest my best be gone
Before the guest.
 ~Beulah Stephany Spencer
(age 12)

Long Fellows
I’m a poet and I know it,
But my feet don’t show it;
They’re not “Longfellow’s,”
They’re short fellows
~Stephany Spencer

The Old Grind
I’ve kept my head to the grindstone,
My shoulders to the wheel;
It’s the best way I knew
To grind out a deal.
~Stephany Spencer


The “Butt” of a Joke
His butt’s as broad as a broad’s or bitch’s
But flat as the broadside of a barn in britches…
But could this “butt” be
But a yarn in stitches?
I’m sure not sure which it is!
~Stephany Spencer  


Anecdote Quote

Find love before it’s too late:
Always good advice to take
For the older you get
And the longer you wait,
The harder it gets

To find a mate.

~Stephany Spencer



   Go Thru It to Get Thru It

They say we must go through it
To get through it — 
Go back over our past
And go through the shit 
Again and again
To get through with it.

The only way out 
Is through it, then;
And we must do it
Over and over again
Till we get it.
Then we can move on.
 Got it!  
Then move on!  :)~
~Stephany Spencer




Watch out for people who offer
“A shoulder to hold her
Or cry on!
Or who promise the sky
Then lie on and on …
While they let it fall on you.
For one in ten people
is a Con —
A sociopath,
Says the text

The Sociopath Next Door,”
Authored by 
Martha Stout.
You may want to check it out.
~Stephany Spencer


Follow Your Own Higher Power

Fanatics say:
Don’t think you’re a big shot,
‘Cause you’re not.

You’re a little snot!
And don’t get out of line!
Toe the line!
Serve the Divine.
But I say:

Don’t mind!
Use your own brain.
Follow your True Self’s line.
That’s the reason God gave
Humankind their mind.
~Stephany Spencer


None of Our Business

What I think of myself
Is none of your business.
And what you think of me
Is none of mine!
In other words,
What I thinketh of me
Is none of thine;
And what thou thinketh of me
Is none of mine.
~Stephany Spencer



Stinky Propositions

They fit hand-in-glove,
Those in iniquity —
The power-mongers
And their brown-nosers
Rooting for perks, power,
And popularity.
I’ll do anything to make it!
Even stoop ‘n’ take it
, says he —

I’d let him make it in my ass,
Said young Joe Crass,

A wannabe —
Anything to be in a movie!
It’s a stinkin’ proposition,

If you ask me!
~Stephany Spencer


Ageing = Sageing


The Edge of Age: Forever young

The “edge of age” is always cutting
Into my joy and amore, anymore.
As I “sage,
I find it hurts to be joked about,
Left out, left to die,
Looked down upon,

As though old age were a catching sore.
Ostracism hurts to the core!

Oldsters are the butt of comedians’ fun,
We find the old-foggie pun
Funny when we’re young.
But now I’m old,
I find it unkind, overdone.
“Old folks!” you say.
We oldsters are human;

Still someone!
You’ll be in our shoes someday.

Everyone ages day by day,
From the moment we’ve begun
Won’t be long before YOU
Hit the wall on the run
Then you’ll discover too,
One’s soul is forever young.

~Stephany Spencer



Doctors and Hospitals:


Doctors: Free-wheeling Racketeers

Without an ombudsman to accompany me,
 Doctors can be freewheeling racketeers, I see –-

Free to wheel their rackets however they please,
Unresponsive to their patients’ pleas;
Especially when there’s no witness to back them up,
Doc’s ‘n’ dentist have no fears:
Their peer-policies assure
No corrections by their peers!
Complete power corrupts completely,
So they’re Rollin’ in high gears!
So I’m an impatient inpatient,
Laden with fears!
Stephany Spencer


I’m an impatient inpatient!




Let’s “Take Off” the Weight:
“Butt” Wait! There’s more:

  Party Pounds

Party PoundsParty-Potluck Dinner.
So if you would be thinner,

Be a winner:
Avoid the party-potluck dinner! :)~
~Stephany Spencer



From Lips to Hips: WEIGHT woes

They say:
A moment on the lips,
Forever on the hips!
I say:
A moment in the mouth,
Forever down south!
~Stephany Spencer


Work It Out to Get It Out

 Work it out to get it out — again and again.
 That is, to be healthier and thin,

You must work out the anger, the pain
That’s been stored in your body
Again and again;
Stored time after time.
Because the body keeps the score;
Therefore, you must work it out–
Time and again,
The old pain, and more.
Stephany Spencer

Men and Romance:
 My Romance with Chance …
 A Chance Romance

        In Love with a Womanizer

 Being fit into his schedule,
As fits his fiddling around,
Leaves me unfit to get ’round downtown,
‘Cause I’m tied in stitches and fits
Over a womanizing brown 
Whose misdeeds constantly get me down.
~Stephany Spencer


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