Original Sayings and Doggerel I wrote : From My Pen to Yours
~ Original Sayings ‘n’ Short Poems From My Pen to Yours
I Think Mice Are Very Nice
I think mice are very nice. Some people say they have lice … Leave mouse tracks in their rice. But with pet mice that’s quite rare; So I still do declare, I think mice are very nice! ~Stephany Spencer (My first poem, age 8)
PLEASE NOTE: I wrote each quote— Each quote I wrote:
~Yesterday’s sorrow Is the humor of tomorrow.
~Today’s sorrow is grist For humor mills of tomorrow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NOTE: I wrote each quote— Though the concept’s Been around a long time, ‘Twas moi who put it To rhythm and rhyme. ~Stephany Spencer
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WORDS OF ADVICE
Threadbare Underwear While growing up dormouse-poor, I avoided being caught once more With clothing threadbare And dingy underwear (When guests were there) By using the worst first, ‘Lest the best be gone Before the guest. ~Beulah Stephany Spencer (age 12)
Long Fellows I’m a poet and know it, But my feet don’t show it! They’re not Longfellow’s, They’re short fellows. ~Stephany Spencer -LeBaron
The Old Grind I’ve kept my head to the grindstone, My shoulders to the wheel; It’s the best way I knew To grind out a deal. ~Stephany Spencer
The “Butt” of a Joke His butt’s as broad As a broad’s or bitch’s But flat as the broadside Of a barn in britches… But could this “butt” be But a yarn in stitches? I’m sure not sure which it is! ~Stephany Spencer
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An Anecdote Quote
Find love before it’s too late Is always good advice to take; For the older you get And the longer you wait, The harder it gets To find a mate. ~Stephany Spencer
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Go Thru It to Get Thru It
They say we must go through it To get through it — Go back over our past And go through the shit Again and again To get through with it.
The only way out Is through it, then; And we must do it Over and over again Till we get it. Then we can move on. Got it? Then move on! :)~ ~Stephany Spencer
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Sociopathy
Watch out for those who offer “A shoulder to hold ‘er,” Or cry on! And promise the sky; But lie on and on … Then let it fall on you. For one in ten people is a Con—A sociopath, Says “The Sociopath Next Door,” By Martha Stout. (You may want to check it out.) ~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron
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Follow Your Own Higher Power
Fanatics say: Don’t think you’re a big shot! You’re not. You’re a little snot. And don’t get out of line: Toe the line! Serve the Divine! But I say: Don’t mind! Use your own brain. Follow your True Self’s line. That’s the reason God gave Humankind their own mind. ~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron
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None of Our Business
What I think of myself Is none of your business. And what you think of me Is none of mine! In other words, What I thinketh of me Is none of thine; And what thou thinketh of me Is none of mine. ~Stephany Spencer
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Stinky Propositions They fit hand-in-glove, Those in iniquity — The power-mongers And their brown-nosers Rooting for perks, power, And popularity. “I’ll do anything to make it! “Even stoop ‘n’ take it,” says he — “I’d let him make it in my ass,” Says young Joe Crass, A wannabe … “Anything to be in a movie!” It’s a stinkin’ proposition, If you ask me! ~Stephany Spencer
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Ageing = Sageing
The Edge of Age: Forever young The “edge of age” Is ever cutting Into my joy and amore, anymore. As I “sage,” I find it hurts to be joked about, Left out, left to die; Looked down
upon, As though old age were a catching sore. Ostracism hurts to the core!
Oldsters are the butt of comedians’ fun— We find the old-foggie pun Funny when we’re young. But now I’m old, I find it unkind, And overdone. “Old folks!” you say. We oldsters are human … We’re still someone! You’ll be in our shoes someday. Everyone ages day by day, From the moment we’ve begun. Won’t be long before YOU Hit the wall on the run. Then you’ll discover too, One’s soul is forever young. ~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron
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Doctors and Hospitals
Doctors: Free-wheeling Racketeers
Without an ombudsman to accompany me, Doctors can often be freewheeling racketeers, I now see –- Free to wheel their rackets however they please; Unresponsive to their patients’ pleas… Especially when there’s no witness to back them up.
For Doc’s ‘n’ dentist have no fears: Their peer-policies assure No corrections by their peers! Complete power corrupts completely, So they’re Rollin’ in high gears! Therefore, I’m an impatient inpatient, Laden with fears! ~Stephany Spencer-Lebaron
I’m an impatient inpatient!
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Let’s “takeoff” the weight: “Butt” wait! There’s more:
Let’s “Take Off” the Weight: “Butt” Wait! There’s more:
Party Pounds
“Party Pounds” Equals “Party-Potluck Dinner.“ If you‘d be thinner, Be a winner: Avoid the party-potluck dinner! :)~
~Stephany Spencer
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From Lips to Hips: WEIGHT woes
They say: A moment on the lips, Forever on the hips! “Butt” I say: A moment in the mouth, Forever down south!
~Stephany Spencer-LeBaron
Work It Outto Get It Out
Work it out to get it out — Again and again: To be healthy and thin, We must work out anger and pain That’s been stored in our body … Work it out again and again.
The body keeps the score; Therefore, we must work it out Time and again … The old pain,and more. ~Stephany Spencer
Men and Romance: My Romance with Chance — A Chance Romance
In Love with a Fiddler
Being fit into his schedule, As fits his fiddlin‘ around, Leaves me unfit To get ’round downtown; “Cause I’m tied in stitches and fits, Playing second fiddle to a philandering clown Whose let-downs constantly Get me down. ~Stephany Spencer
Stinky Propositions
The Edge of Age: Forever young
STEPHANY SPENCER: 