Jim Gaffigan Madigan and Gaffigan By Stephany Spencer-LeBaron What a brilliant comedian is Jim Gaffigan He makes me laugh then laugh again His moniker is “Mr. Universe"He's earned this title in action and verseHe's a regular dynamo running in reverse! Most stand-up comics lewdly gesture and curseTheir work is loaded with smut and worse Trying to…
Poem/Lyrics: “In Mexico, Down Past the Rio Grande”
Picnicking in the Canyons above Colonia LeBaron, Galeana, Chihuahua, Mexico In Mexico, Down Past the Rio Grande by Stephany Spencer Song Version:1— In Mexico, down past the Rio Grande,I buried my diaries in the desert sand;Now they lie lost in a foreign land --Lost in LeBaron when I fled the clan.Lost my poetry in the…
“Painted Spring:” Take-off from Spanish Traditional Song “De Colores”
A Lesson Too Late In The Learning: Write It or Regret It Recently, at the California Writers Club, a fellow poet and guest speaker, Deborah Edler Brown, advised: "At the moment of inspiration, record it. Don't wait! For it's like babies lost you can never retrieve if you don't record your inspiration when it comes."…
Bio Ballad in Verse, for Better or Worse
Circa 1958: 11 of my parents' ultimately 14 children(I'm age 12, middle row, 2nd to left) Bio Ballad in Verse for Better or Worseby Stephany Spencer-LeBaronI was born some time agoAway out in the sticksIn Mexico’s Rocky Mountain RangeIn 1946Was raised in a Mormon cultWhere self-righteous hicksThought it sinfulWith…
William P. Tucker’s Baby and Wife Left to Die by Cult, Sister, & Bill’s Buddy Stephen Silver
28-year-old Bill Tucker and 18-year-old Beulah Stephany Spencer-LeBaron de Tucker with our Six-month-old baby Asenath Marie "Where there's a will, there's a way." William James In July 1967, three months after my/our husband, William Preston Tucker/AKA: Bill Tucker (I say "our" husband because I was one of Bill's three wives), announced to the "church" he…
Short Creek/ Colorado City, Arizona-Utah: “They Changed the Name of Our Hometown”
Sing your song, Dance your dance, Tell your tale. ---Frank McCourt, Modern-day Dickens, Author of best-selling classics: Angela's Ashes, 'Tis, and Teacher Man They Changed the Name of Our Hometown* 1— They changed the name of our hometown the other day, But in the hearts of some Short Creek will always stay; The cliffs so high, the…
Fred Morrow Plumbing: Super Savings on Sewer Sub-Meters!
Poets for Fred Morrow Plumbing,* And super-savings on Sewer Sub-Meters: (He’s installed hundreds of these meter readers!) First class, first choice Contractor’s corporation — In my humble opinion, Best plumbing Co. in the nation! I hired Fred Morrow So I wouldn’t be sorry tomorrow; Did my homework; So I don't repent in sorrow! On April…
Do You Dig?
Do You Dig? To find enlightenment and succeed in life’s journey toward individuation and edification, we might participate in an inner archaeological dig. Assisting Workshops are found under "Soul-Searching Archaeology," offered free at The College of Life, and Hard Knox University. Do you “dig”? These workshops include a certain kind of digging into our inner…
Pt 19-C: Esther LeBaron Spencer, Me, and More Perils of Polygamy
My Memoir, Part 19-C: Esther LeBaron McDonald de Spencer -- And More Perils of Polygamy "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." Abraham Lincoln I left off in "My Memoir: Esther LeBaron McDonald de Spencer -- And More Perils of Polygamy -- Part 19-B" commenting: In Homer Babbitt's kiss There was no…
Life’s Dash
LIFE'S DASH My cousin, the famous Eddie LeBaron “There'll be two dates on your tombstone And all your friends will read ‘em; But all that's going to matter- Is that little dash between ‘em.” Kevin Welch LIFE'S DASH by Stephany Spencer-LeBaron 1- Between the dates of birth and death, There's always a little dash -- To…
Review of the California Writers Club Anniversary Anthology, “Cascade of Pearls”
Ode to The California Writers Club: The California Writers Club is our oyster, And writers the pearls polished within her. Stephany Spencer 2016 2016 marked the 30th anniversary -- The Pearl Anniversary of The California Writers Club: San Fernando Valley Branch. For thirty years, This club's been our "oyster" ranch, And we members Pearls growing within her dance, Polishing…
Pt 1–18: Esther LeBaron Spencer, Me, and Mormon Polygamist Cults Unmasked
A Memoir: FLEEING POLYGAMY: Out of LeBaronism into the Lightby Stephany Spencer-LeBaron PART 1:Esther LeBaron-McDonald Spencer:My Mother: Image “Mother! For love of thee it was begun;In thy most honored name today ’tis done.And though all earthly cares must ceaseIn that fair land of everlasting peace,Love aye is one, and they who love…
Happy-New-Year Medley
HAPPY NEW YEAR! TWO-THOUSAND-NINETEEN IS HERE!! By Stephany Spencer (to tune of Auld Lang Syne) 1- Two-thousand-nineteen is here! We are one year older: Everyone has grown And we are bolder As we enter this new year. So let us make a resolution To never be the problem -- Only the solution To our problems ... every one. 2-…
Pretty City Chic: A Bit o’ Bio in Verse
Stephany Spencer-LeBaron, age 38 Pretty City Chic Dearest friends and fans,Please note: This tongue-in-cheek song I wrote Is half-finished so I don't gloat,But pray my poem won’t get your goat; It's late -- blog's due “mañana;” Check the song later on ... uh ... You'll find it's been “re-wrote”... "Needs work" is my last quote. But please enjoy…
Thanksgiving Day Medley
Our First Thanksgiving Day: A Thanksgiving Medley Across the Atlantic Ocean, a long time ago Came pilgrims on the Mayflower, a new world to know. Freedom of religion was what they sought; Starvation and illness were problems they fought. But the people worked together, And some friendly Indians taught These pilgrims how to better use…
Notes, Quotes, Jokes; Pokes, ‘n’ Anecdotes
Bimbo Weeps: I'm sittin' alone in the moonlight, At the Heartbreak Hotel Café, Abandoned by women and men; And here's all I have to say: “I’ll never eat garlic nor onions again -- Not till my dying day --They've driven my possible friends away, Kept romance and intimacy at bay!"By Stephany Spencer BIG LOVE Bimbo…
Some of My Pieces Published 2007–2008 in the California Writers Club “The Scribe”
* NOTE: I have taken some of my pieces that were published in…
Original Quotes, Notes, ‘n’ Anecdotes on Writing ‘n’ Creativity
Stephany Spencer, age 20, taken off guard Hi! I am Stephany Spencer, Poet, Lyricist, Memoirist, and Musician -- a professional Jackalin-of-many-trades. And a retired teacher on her endless summer. Welcome to my own little corner of the world-wide-web! As we speak, my fledgling Website continues to grow as I continue to develop the skills of a Webmaster, Blogger, and Photoblogger.…
Mariachi Musician Juan José
Mariachi Musician Juan José 1- He was born some time ago, Way out in the sticks, In a valley of Old Mexico, The year nineteen-forty-six. By the time he turned thirteen, There were siblings of twelve; For everything he ever got He had to dig and delve. CHORUS: Dig and delve, yes, dig and…
The Sands of My Hourglass
The Sands of My Hourglass The sands of time are running Through my hourglass, Telling me I don't have much time Taking away my time As surely as canAny hands on a clock. I can't get the speed to stop Neither my heart That goes tic-toc And pitter-pat Like raindrops On the window pane of…
A New Day’s Dawning
A New Day’s Dawning: By Stephany Spencer 1- I feel bad, I feel blue, Sad because this day is through; Still so much left to do; But in the morning I'll start anew. For God gives, and God takes; Every day is a gift God makes. Soon my life will be through, But Blues,…
Tony Robbin Tips: Emote the Emotion
"Emote the Emotion" Emote the emotion, Over-and-over, You want to feel, Says Tony Robbins, "Modern Guru Pill." You can change your "emotion," By changing your "motion." You're at the wheel. In other words:Change physiology,Change unwanted emotions --It's a done deal! Stand tall and proud When you're afraid,Whistle a tune that'll aid;Turn your frown upside downWhen you're feeling…
Pushy Prez
Pushy Prez I'm repelled by your trying to screw me Onto the Volunteers BoardThrough arm twisting And emotional blackmail.It's a wonder my arm Is still in its socket,And I in control of my own Destiny and free will.Badgering me will get you Nothing but backpedaling from me --That is, pedaling backwards Away from you As…
Ragged Rug/Rugged Rag
Ragged Rug/Rugged Rag There is a ragged looking rug On the bug. Better on him Than on an old mug. Old mugs need all The help they can get. It's hard to face old-age without it. "Ragged-looking lawn," you say? "Hey, what's he got on today? A toupe`? How much would you pay To look…
The C-Average Rule
The C-Average RuleThey're commandeering The pecking party Like a gaggle of geese Or a flock of hens -- Another Betsy-boots syndrome: He-men women in charge.They stamp you down If you dare get up courage Enough to open your "pecker" And let out of peep That’s the "fowl" Language of the pack -- "The C-Average Rule."Forget…
Wonder How I’ll Go
Wonder how I'll go. What will be my final blow? What will finally bring me down When life has brought me up, thus far, And saved my life so many times before, Till now, and kept me 'round? Well, can't complain. I'm in God's hands, As inane as it sometimes sounds. I know a Higher…
Ponderin’ and Wonderin’: A Conversation with Self
Ponderin' and Wonderin': A Conversion with Self At seventy-one, I'm hung upon my ladder's last rung, With its many steps, And the protruding doornails of a door half hung, Wonderin' what more in life I could've won, And why still try to do something BIG before I'm done? Shouldn't I presently Commit to having fun? Cease…
Life’s a Wreck!
Life's a Shipwreck! Or should I simply conclude: "That ship has sailed — Like two ships passing in the night,” Coming unglued? Or I could say, "Life's a train wreck.”? Or has that train left the station too, Like two trains passing a wreck or two? I've lived a long time – a…
Cast Your Worries to the Wind
Cast Your Worries to the windby stephany Spencer-LeBaron My Uncle Joel LeBaron's favorite maxim,Cast your worries to the wind; Let the rain settle them,Was keen wisdom:"To yourself be kind,"He would often remind;"Leave negatives behind.Wind blows them away During the daily grind;Rain settles all, in time."Dump the big boulder; Don't let it smolder!Toss over your shoulder Things you…
Battles of the Bulge
I eat, at times, to simply nurture That gaping hole in my existence, I'm sure. But one feather in my cap is I regularly get up And a do a great morning workout routine. I may feel like I'm bent, spent, and useless, For some time thereafter, should I overdo. But somehow, I "work it all…
Ode to Chava Chavarin and the Tres Camarones Team
Tres Camarones/Three Shrimp Dr. Luis Alberto Urrea’s audiobook Into the Beautiful North inspired the following lyrics: Ode to Chava Chavarin*and the Tres Camarones Teamby Stephany Spencer-LeBaron Hey!What's in a name?I can't say;but the moniker“Chava Chavarin”rings in my brain today,though I completedthe novel yesterday.Like music in rain,This sonorous name motivated my muse to pen poems for play!So…
Poem: “Advice for Creatives”
"Part of the reason that people don’t become enlightened is because it’s punctuated by intermittent catastrophes."WordToTheWise Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."An axiom DARE, DEAR CREATIVES, DARE!by Stephany Spencer-LeBaron"Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."Creatives can onlypresent works to the world... see their originations unfurled,if they dare---dare to fail, in order to dare do…
Poem: Lovely Lively Lizards
Lovely Lively Lizards I detest supporting lazy "lizards" -- Leeches, losers, and welfare abusers: Socialism can be Welfare for users. So, lazy-daisy loafing "lizards," Penniless-paupers, down-and-out dizzards, Get off your rump, use your gizzard, And from the welfare rolls be scissored! My new slogan is herein delivered: "Be part of the solution, Not the pollution…
Poem: “Dr. Kwak”
"Judas," with her doctor's plaque hung above her door, Should have read: "Dr. Kwak treats gullibles and more!" For "A Quack and a sucker are born each minute!" That sucks! So don't get dropped in it! Don't fall for each quacky gimmick. You could end up dead in a minute, And all 'cause Polly wanted…
Poem: “Less and Less the U.S.”
More and more we are less and less The U.S. we used to be. It's inflation and stagnation, you see. And illegal immigration And the global economy-- These three mixed with the usual greed Are legendary down through the century. And it's changed what once was our country. I wonder now, are we really so…
Poem: “In Retrospect”
From Ma to Marie, they competed with me Like free-wheelers in Bedlam Town -- The devils had come ‘round to roost – It was All Souls Day in hell —Free reign was given the devil For a thousand years, as well — Plus a ticket to ride My poor hide in all gears!No holds were…
Poem: “Ladies Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places”
- Does low self-esteem Cause the womanizer's chase? And is scoring all Ladies' Men Have going for their race? What the fuck, then! What "luck"! Is this their journey on life’s playing field? Then it's best never to them yield. For their dick has a life of its own to wield! Just wish I…
Original Sayings and Short Poems: From My Pen to Yours
~ Original Sayings 'n' Short Poems From My Pen to Yours @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I Think Mice Are Very Nice I think mice are very nice. Some people say they have lice, And leave mouse tracks in their rice. With pet mice that's quite rare, So therefore I declare, I still think mice are very nice! Stephany Spencer (My…
Essay-Poem: “John Cage and Composing”
Avant-garde composer John Cage said: "The material of music is sound and silence. Integrating these is composing." We could say:The material of poetryis sound and silence; syllables and silence. Integrating these is composing --albeit poetry. We could compose music and poems that go together; i.e., compose songs: Songs are poems--lyrics set to music. Now I morph into a poem that…
Poem: “Hel’s Home Life”
Tulips 7-09/9-16 Helen's home life Makes mine and Marie’s life Look complacent in comparison. Her home’s a hotbed for tulips Or "two lips" – in hell! Oh, well! Poor “Hel.” But you never can tell, From the outside, If a home's a heaven or hell On the inside. It's probably just as…
Poem: “A Breakthrough”
Now I know God loves us all the same, And we all partake of joy and pain, Free will and choice, loss and gain; Plus a chance to journey to the waters main, Drink up and make a memorable name, And an understanding of all things attain. Though the journey is far from ever…
